Friday

Angor Animi

Angor animi as defined in the glossary of Migraine, Oliver Sacks: Fear for the soul, sense of imminent dissolution, overwhelming dread and conviction of death. A peculiar and terrible form of fear.

Pendulum stalking, thins the moon to gruel,
then I am harrowed in spoiled gears,
pending in the slack petals of spaded equations.

But young and of yet
unpracticed in grief,
I had not then the knack for it,

nor knew to bait my sleep for these stern visions,
the shabby traffic of my little pillow
which I needn't even rise to receive.

Variously, I am tabled and chaired
in the pale ceremony of malted medicines;
I howl and thrash like an old dog or a new ghost,

and sheets of rain make up my bed.

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